Gimme A Hug

I feel so much love in my life. It feels as if I am big enough to give the whole world a hug.  :D :D :D














Lot's of love,
Natasha A. Juan

The Looking Glass

She said, 'yes.'
I said, 'no.'

I said, 'let it go.'
She said, 'I won't do so.'

I said, 'I need help.'
she said, 'I am your help.'

I said, 'I wanted to give up.'
she said, 'but, I don't want to give up.'

I said, 'you are confusing,'
she said, 'of course I am..'




'I am YOU'.

Written by,
Natasha A. Juan

Unconditional Love

Free, like an angel,
disguised in many forms.

You're never far away,
you were never gone at all.

Your laugh colours my world,
your touch heals the pain.

It takes only you,
even through lost wars, I regain.





Natasha A. Juan

Pardon My Arrogance

Dedicated to those whom I love.

When I thought you weren't listening, you were working hard to fulfill my

financial needs.

When I thought you weren't listening, you were doing the very best you can

to make me feel better.

When I thought you weren't listening, you were there for me even under 

pressure.

When I thought you weren't listening, you stuck by me when in ur mind you

had somewhere better to go.

When I thought you weren't listening, you fought your own battles to cater 

to my needs.

When I thought you weren't listening, you patiently listened even being 

brutally accused by me.

When I thought, you weren't listening, you held my hand as I cursed and 

cussed at the wind with you in it.

When I thought, you weren't listening; I had forgotten that all these while, 

you had loved me all along.

When I thought, you weren't listening, it was I, whom was too blind to realize, 

that you have listened all along.

* I wrote this poem within 5 minutes after a life-long's worth of self-reflection.

The guilty author,

Natasha A. Juan

Thank you for viewing. :)

I Zone Out To This

Simply awesome.


Love,
Natasha A. Juan

Did You Find Some Happiness With Me?

Love,
Natasha A. Juan

Without Love, Our Earth Is A Tomb

"I walked a mile with Pleasure; 
 She chatted all the way; 
 But left me none the wiser 
 For all she had to say. 

 I walked a mile with Sorrow; 
 And ne’er a word said she; 
 But, oh! The things I learned from her, 
 When Sorrow walked with me." 





"  So, fall asleep love,
  Loved by me..
  For I know love,
  I am loved by thee."



   - Robert Browning







Hello you, it's been awhile. :)



Love,
Natasha A. Juan

Be Nice To Thy Wives

Husband: Whenever I get mad at you, you never fight back. How do you control your anger?

Wife: I clean the toilet bowl.

Husband: How does that help?

Wife: I use your toothbrush.

Damnnnn.Revenge is sweet!

;)

Natasha A. Juan

HAPPY BIRTHDAY DEAR LOVER

It kills me to not be there for you on your special day. But I promise you I'll make it up to you. You have been there for me through the stormy days and you certainly have been with me laughing throughout the calm. I love you more than I can say and there is no one else more dear to my heart than you. You showed me patience, passion, and love like no other.

On this special day itself, we found each other. How we met, and fell in love, well there will be another time to  for that. Today, 21st November, marks a beautiful and special day for my dearly beloved. It's his birthday (as if you all do not know that already).

I'll be with you sooner than you know. I am missing you so much and I am celebrating your special day with you,please remember that I am only a beat away.

To the man who gave me the freedom to submit freely and willingly with a love that surpasses all understanding;

I love you with all my loving heart and soul.

Your lover,
Natasha A. Juan

D.R.A.I.N.E.D

Dear Time Master,

Please do me a favor and heal my tears and wears.





Your slave,
Natasha A. Juan

Colonel "Hannibal" Joe

Meet the love of my life...

He entertains me on lonely days. You'll get to see more of him soon. ;)



Love,
Natasha A. Juan

Shall We Dance To This?

:D


Love,
Natasha A. Juan

Hurt & Love

Precious Love,

Just so you know these two powerful emotions have something in common.

You feel it in the pit of your stomach,

you feel it in the center of your bones,

you feel it from the crown of your head,

to the soles of your feet.

Then again it is better to feel something, than to feel nothing at all.

I'm a thinker, and I worry way too much (yes, even the unnecessary). Most of the time, 'knowing' things makes me understand but does not make me accept any better. I tend to follow my blood, which sometimes does not rush to the direction of my brain. Hence, I make a lot of mistakes, and wrong bloody calls. Somewhere along the way, 'people' do get hurt. I truly am, sorry.

But,

Trust me, I love what you are and what you do. I am here for better or worse, whenever. Happiness and sadness run parallel to each other it seems. When one takes a rest, the other one tends to take up the slack. Just please, bear with me.

Hey, look at me, don't look away. Don't ever, do that. I love you. Theres always a rainbow after it rains and so they say.  But I won't be waiting for you at the rainbows end. I will walk with you, if you allow me to. I am a clumsy person. I will trip occasionally, but with you I know, I will not fall.

I am a woman with many principles, most of my friends are aware of that. I know you do too. But, I'd rather lose my pride to someone I love, rather than losing someone I love with my useless pride."What matters to you matters to me". Yes, 'you' said that to me once, I'll be holding on to that for as long as I can.

p/s: I love you, with all my heart and soul.

Your lover,

Natasha A. Juan

Unresolved

I told a lie today.

Even the 'strong', has it's weakest days.

Natasha A. Juan

The Man Behind The Mask

The man in the mask then handed me a rose. At this point, I was certain that I knew who it was. It was my lover. He took off his mask and kissed me and hugged me so tight. He kept on saying, "I missed you so much and I love you." 

The love of my life flew down to surprised me on Halloween and my two friends was his accomplice. That was the sweetest thing ever. The truth is, I dislike surprises. I dislike the fact of not able to see things coming my way. 

Left to right: Fahriee, Me and the Love of my life.

I then recalled something Fahrie said to me during dinner before the Halloween, only now that it adds up.

Fahrie: Tasha, do you think tonight is going to be a good night?

Me: (without any enthusiasm) I dunno. If it is a goodnight it'll be a good night, if it isn't that it isn't. (typical me)

Fahrie: I have a feeling tonight is going to be a good night. (smiling)

My lover told me this once, "I am coming home to you my love, this time I am bringing you a rose". He is a man of his words. That night, that particular Halloween night. He never took his eyes and hands of me and whispered 'I love you' throughout the night. It'll be a night I'll always remember.

He drew me a beautiful memory.

To my friends, thank you, thank you, thank you. 

To the love of my life, Andreas Dyrman Dasan, Loving you is the 'highlight' to my everyday. Happy 11 months and 8 days. I love you with all my heart, with all my soul.

Lot's of love,

Natasha A. Juan

A New Friend

Meet Mr.Plastic Hand.


I was bored.


Okay, bye.



My cheeks are tired.



Love,
Natasha A. Juan



*Thank you, for viewing.

You Wish You Were Here

We live in a awesome world. In so many ways.

Location: Pandan Beach, Lundu (Kuching, Sarawak).




Love,
Natasha A. Juan

The Bull Sh!tted

Lies. It's like digging up your own grave. The best thing about knowing those who lies is when all along you have known the truth.


Oh. You can quote me.


Wait, I'm not finished. I am not playing GOD here. I just irks me that because of one lie led to a mass of trouble that ended with me stuck in between. Clean after your own poop, because you've got hands and you're not a dog.


Lie at your own risk. Do NOT trouble others.



*This entry has nothing to do with the loved ones.












Very much annoyed,
Natasha A. Juan

Toy Store

I raided the toy store today.



Life's good.:)






Love,
Natasha A. Juan

A Movie I'll NEVER Watch

This is a movie I will never attempt to watch:

Don't get me wrong. I love dogs. Way too much.

The reason I will not attempt to watch this is because I am 100% positively sure I will bawl my eyes out. Any movie related to animals I for one, will cry. I have read about the legendary Hachiko and no, I do not like how it ends.

I know I will cry during the movie, after the movie, once in awhile when looking at my dog, Jackie, once in awhile when I unconsciously thought about it, and every other time when I purposely think about it (don't ask me why, I don't know. It just happens).

I have seriously, a soft spot for animals (even when it's animated). And this will be something I will carry on forever since the first watch.

It has been 23 times of watching Free Willy since it 1st came out in 1994. Here we are in 2010, I still can't stop tearing up when ever I do watch it. I guess the sense of losing/ being apart of someone/ something you really love gets to me. Heck, I cried watching Toy Story 3.

That's why I enjoy watching violent movies like Scarface, 300 and The Hill's Have Eyes. There aren't any character(s) to sympathize, really. Plus the movies are merciless. Angst and violence, blood splatters, oooh, I love.

I'd prefer this:

than this:

on any given day.

Okay, okay,  you got me. *hands up*

*Sighs*

Truthfully, I want to watch Hachiko so badly. But I'm scared. I might need someone to hold both my hands, hand me tissues, someone to hug and at the end, laugh. Because, I tend to feel rather silly afterwards. Hee.

To your dog, you are all it has. The love is real, the compassion is real. It has no tricks up it's furry paws. 

(Somehow, I have managed to turn this entry into a Public Service Announcement.)

I should stop now. *sits on her two hands*

Love,

Natasha A. Juan

Taking Any Given Sunday

It's a bummer when my DSLR run's out of battery. Some photos here are taken using my pocket cam. I hope your weekend was as chilled as mine. I would like to thank Adrian for taking me to the beach as well.=)



Here's a superb song for you to start your week:




Thank you for viewing.




Natasha A. Juan

Video Of The Week

Thanks to Irene Chan who tagged me on a Facebook post to this not-much-of-a-life-changing video.

My respond to this video was that I laughed non stop during the first few minutes. Then, I actually paid attention at this hypnotizing dance. My attention diverted from the dance to wondering if he was actually wearing undies. A bit after, I was thinking that he has such long, long hair. I'm guessing that if my hair was to be as long as that, may be I should do a dance video, post it on you tube, preferably semi naked of course (people might mistake my hair as a high fashion cape, hence, considered as clothes).

This video had 53,424 viewers, okeyhh. Hmm. I'd also have to grow a beard and a mustache. Then again, I am not too sure if my moves are as groovy as his.

I have another awesome video to share. Not too sure if you can see this, it's on Facebook. But here's the link anyway.

http://www.facebook.com/video/video.php?v=454068742979&ref=mf




Enjoy your weekend party beasts!




Your bodyrocker,
Natasha A. Juan

Lunch Conversation

I saw a beehive when we were driving past St. Joseph's Secondary School today. I was out for lunch with my buddy, Fahriee. That, resulted to this conversation:


N: I'm scared of bees.

F: Why bah?

N: Because they fly any how they like, and I'm scared that it will sting me.

F: I am scared of cockroaches.

N: Why bah?

F: Because it can crawl in your ear and lay eggs.


=.="





You have been warned.







Natasha A. Juan

Good Morning

Ghost lover gave me 12 roses this morning, 11 real and one fake. He told me he will love me until the last one dies.

I love you ghost lover.









Natasha A. Juan

Ghost Lover Made Me Tea

He woke me up with a song. My eyes were still half shut as he brushed my hair of my face. I could only smile. He kissed my ear and whispered, "i love you". He pulled me closer and wrapped his arms around me. The warmth. That warmth, that he brings to me, felt ever so calming.

We talked and talked for hours.

Then, said it was time for him to leave.

He realized a frown that had formed on my forehead and said, "Don't you worry my love, we'll meet again. After all, were reaching the same rainbow's end."







Natasha A. Juan

Art Is Subjective

The artist: Melinda Boyce



I hope you love these as much as  did. Too cute, no?





Love,
Natasha A. Juan

Ghost Lover Please Come Back

Dear Ghost Lover,

You seem to have faded away. Is it me? Have I forgotten what it's like being with you? Everyone seems to keep on saying they have never left my side. That they have been here all along. Surrounded by many, I still feel lonely. Although grateful, theres a sense on emptiness in me.

I lost the drive to sing. I am uninspired. I lost my tracks. Have you swept them away? Please don't. Please don't. I can survive without you. I know i'll be fine. But I'd like you to stay. Please say you will stay. These days I feel numb. What I'm afraid is that one day, I might get use to you not being around. Truthfully, I'm scared. Because I know one day I'll be fine without you. I don't want that to happen. I just don't.

I left this seat empty just for you.

p/s: I miss you terribly, please come back. Please?

Natasha A. Juan

H.O.M.E

                                                                                                  

Lot's of love,
Natasha A. Juan

Can't We Try

From where I was sitting. And no. I was not paid to put this up.

Love always,
Natasha A. Juan